English Essay free essay sample

Everything is different from what you know. A new house, a new language, new clothes, new traditions and on top of it all, a new school. School is already stressful enough, but then add in the idea of going to a school in a brand new country. You don’t know anyone and making friends is much harder because of the language barrier, not to mention understanding lectures and lessons in class. Fitting in is difficult for immigrants especially in schools, which jeopardizes their success in achieving the American Dream. In the poem Elena by Pat Mora, the main character moved to America with her family. She talked about the hardships of her transition into a new country. Since she and her family moved to America, her children now both attend American high schools. They are now completely bilingual, which leaves their mother feeling left out. She is the only one left in her family who has yet to learn English. †¢ Although the majority of students responded to some aspect of the statement at some point in their essay, it was disappointing that so many failed to sustain their acknowledgement of the key words of the question. Before you start writing, you need to think about these things in relation to specific ideas. You need to create a thesis in response to the question given and to develop your discussion around clear topic sentences which foreground the idea – you should not organize your paragraph around a technique†¦ the technique will support/illustrate the idea. †¢ It is not good enough to ‘top and tail’ an essay that you have pre-prepared. †¢ You need to integrate your discussion around the thesis. †¢ Construct topic sentences which reflect your thesis. †¢ Resist the temptation to begin paragraphs with context and speaker’s background. Stronger responses These demonstrated: †¢ confident and articulate use of language †¢ ability to write a sustained and coherently structured and well supported discussion in response to this question. †¢ A perceptive knowledge and understanding of the texts. †¢ A strong focus on ideas and how these ideas are conveyed. †¢ Acknowledge the effect of context on speaker’s purpose in a subtle integration. A strong response has an introduction which clearly addresses the question, acknowledges key terms and establishes a thesis. Effective introduction – student sample: The values of speeches can be assessed through Graham Freudenberg’s ‘identification’ of views of content over rhetoric. The ability to address influential issues of politics can only be represented by the use of rhetorical devices. In Paul Keating’s speech ‘Funeral Service of an Unknown Australian Soldier’ and Aung San Suu Kyi’s ‘Keynote address at the Bejing World Conference of Women’, both speeches are able to address key political ssues which impact on their intended audiences, the ideas of national identity, unity of a nation in Keating’s speech compared to Suu Kyi’s concepts of equality of women and the advantages they bring to society can be perceived as morally challenging being able to engage the audience as these issues are made relevant as they transcend time and context being relevant to today’s society. Effective paragraphs – student samp le: Speech writer Freudenberg believes that in all great speeches, the content is more important than the rhetoric. He makes a fair point and asserts that any speech is influenced and based on content and context and that speech is defined by audience’s context and purpose. This is true for both Keating’s and Bandler’s speeches. Keating’s purpose of paying tribute to those who made the ultimate sacrifice in war is achieved throughout his eulogy on Remembrance Day 1993 as he focuses on honouring the powerful and important individuals affected by the war. Keating, Prime Minister at the time, achieves this through the use of ‘ladder’ structure whereby he begins by respectfully acknowledging the loss and sacrifice of the Unknown Australian Soldier. However, gradually builds up to what I believe is his main idea – glorifying the individuals affected by war and highlighting the impact they had on shaping our nation today. Keating uses the paradox of ‘it was a lesson about ordinary people, and the lesson was that they were not ordinary’ to emphasise his belief that the individuals were in fact special and ‘the heroes of war were the soldiers and sailors and nurses’. This again emphasizes Freudenberg’s idea that great issues – that of honouring those who sacrificed their lives in war – in Keating’s case – will give rise to great speeches. Weaker Responses: †¢ These often included entire paragraphs devoted to biographical and/or contextual information which was not linked in any way to thesis or evaluation of speaker’s / writer’s use of language. Do not write context paragraphs. †¢ Were undeveloped and often read as if they were a set of notes or simply memorized information with no real sense of having thought about the material in terms of the question. It is inadvisable to provide information about a speech or an essay in a chronological or list-like way (including listing techniques) †¢ Were confused and lacked a coherent structure. Each paragraph needs a topic sentence with which you link your discussion to the question. †¢ The analysis was superficial and not sustained. †¢ Had poor expression (syntax, grammar, spelling and control of vocabulary) †¢ Were sometimes too brief – anything less than four pages cannot illustrate a detailed knowledge of the speeches t or be able to sustain an argument. CRITERIA |Marks | |Demonstrates a sustained thesis that addresses the question and the listening component |17-20 | |Integrates the listening component in a sophisticated manner. Demonstrates an insightful and critical understanding of the value of the speeches and a sophisticated understanding of | | |how the argument/structure of the texts shape meaning and influences our responses | | |Composes a sophisticated and interpretive response to the question using language appropriate to audience and purpose | | |Demonstrates a perceptive thesis that addresses the question and the listening component |13-16 | |A perceptive and sustained response to the listening component | |Demonstrates a perceptive understanding of the value of the speeches and a thoughtful understanding of how the | | |argument/structure of the texts shape meaning and influence our responses. Composes an effective and interpretive response to the question using language appropriate to audience and purpose | | |Demonstrates a sound understanding of the question and listening component |9-12 | |Articulates a sound explanation of the listening component | | |Demonstrates a sound understanding of the value of the speeches and/or how the argument/structure of the texts shape | | |meaning and influence our responses | | |Composes a sound interpretive response to the question using language appropriate to audience and response | | |Demonstrates a limited understanding of the ideas expressed in the text and listening component. Limited reference to the listening component |5-8 | |Describes language forms and features, and structures of the text, with some sense of how meaning is shaped and how our | | |responses are influenced | | |Composes a limited response to the question | | |Demonstrates an elementary understanding of the ideas expressed in the text |1-4 | |Describes the listening component | | |Attempts to describe some language forms and features, and structures of the text, with limited sense of how meaning is | | |shaped and our responses are influenced | | |Attempts to compose a response | | |Non-attempt, virtual non-attempt, non-serious attempt.